The Cycle of Life

It is difficult to write when you are constantly away from home and the travelling leads to exhaustion, no matter how enjoyable things might be along the way.

July/August was supposed to be a fun month – a reward to ourselves for all the hard work we had accomplished beforehand. Friends were joining us for the storytelling festival at Much Wenlock. The weather was much better than forecast – only a few heavy showers and some sunshine. The stories were wonderful and the music lovely, but my mother (who is registered blind and has vascular dementia) decided to go for a walk on her own and had to be returned home in a distressed state by a passing neighbour. She then refused to enter the house for several hours, necessitating calling out the doctor and the ambulance.

When I rang my father to tell him we’d arrived at the festival, it was all over, but I could hear the fear in his voice. He’d been taking a nap when it happened. I had to phone my sister in Italy to brief her on events and she visited the following weekend to make sure everything was safe.

The next weekend I was presenting at Herbfest. It was a wonderful weekend full of enthusiastic herb lovers who welcomed the opportunity to make their own herbal concoctions and wanted to expand their experiences.

It was a long and exhausting journey to north Somerset and I was wiped out with the stress of it all when we returned.

The following Tuesday, my cousin rang me to say my aunt had died. Although it was not unexpected news, it was very sad to share the pain of his loss and worry about breaking the news to my mother. The two sisters had been estranged since my grandmother died forty years ago, but I’d tried to keep some level of communication between the two families and was grateful I’d taken time to write to my aunt and sent photographs just before her death which she had been able to take comfort from.

At 7.15am on the Thursday my eldest son rang to say his wife’s waters had broken and she was in labour. I went into work to be told that because I am managed from the Sheffield office and worked mostly from home, I would no longer have a desk or any shelf space. I was devastated.

To put this in some kind of context, it must be explained that although we have a fairly large and comfortable house, in the past month we have finally, after thirty years of no maintenance, had the roof insulated along with the cavity walls, the gutters and facias replaced, the front door, back door, garage doors and porch replaced and the lounge furniture recovered and the lounge redecorated.

This has meant Chris had to clear several spaces including the roof, box room and our daughter’s bedroom as she decided to come home to live permanently after four years away. The front room which houses both Chris and my computers and the piano where I give lessons is completely filled with extra furniture and piles of books and papers. There are only tracks through the debris and I can’t turn my chair round without hitting something.

The thought of bringing the contents of my work desk and two bookcases/shelving units home was too much. I spent the following week in tears. It brought back all the grief from being made redundant eight years ago when I had to literally put fourteen years of work into black rubbish bags to be thrown away when we cleared my office.

At 5.50pm on Thursday 28th, Richard rang us to say we were now grandparents to a 7lb 14oz boy called James Michael. We heard the first baby snuffles as he lay on his mother’s tummy in the labour ward of St Peter’s hospital in Woking. Laura followed the family tradition of short deliveries, only being in established labour for 5 hours and managing with gas and air.

After a two hour journey and then a further hour wait in the hospital the following day, it was wonderful to finally hold the tiny, warm bundle in our arms and marvel at the tightness of his grip. Everyone else remarked how much he looked like Richard, but I could only see the face of someone I’d never met before, a new person to welcome into the family and learn more about.

The Warwick Folk Festival was very enjoyable, with stunning performances from The Spooky Men’s Chorale and Show of Hands. We also appreciated the lazy days last weekend spent with our friends in The Lake District finalising the details of our American holiday in a month’s time.

The joy of all these events has been tempered by the sadness of my aunt’s death and my mother’s increasing frailty. Every time I speak to her she asks me when I am coming to visit. It doesn’t matter I have been there every three weeks for the past year and will be there again tomorrow and every two or three weeks for the rest of the year. It will never be enough, but it is all I can manage.

Summer plans

Summer is always a busy time. Gardens call us to tend and harvest, but time is really short because we find ourselves travelling across the country nearly every weekend for a two-three month period. Most of this travelling is for fun, but there will be some work involved as well. If you would like to see what the Sanctuary herbs are looking like at the moment, go here.

There are lots of herbal opportunities. Maybe I shall see some of you during our travels. Here is the itinary.

3-5 June Exmouth Kite Festival. If you are in the area, Sky Symphony and other kite teams will be performing next to the rugby club overlooking the estuary. I'm offical tea lady and emergency ground crew for the kites, but I shall be taking time out to wildcraft fennel and yarrow and would love to have herbal conversations with anyone who cared to visit.

12 June (Sunday) Mercian Herb Group visit to Hardwick Hall, Derbyshire. Come and join us on a visit to the historic gardens. Further details can be found here

18 June (Saturday)Springfield Sanctuary workshop on Herbs for the Menopause. There will be oppotunities to make ox-eye daisy flower essence (to help women come to accept the menopause), mugwort and motherwort vinegar and tincture (bring empty jar jars and some vodka and cider vinegar) and meet herbs which can support women through this life event. I'm also offering some energy healing practice at the end of the workshop.

29 June (Wednesday). During my week up in Newcastle for work, I'm taking the opportunity to offer a herb talk to Newcastle Carers, so as well as delivering bereavement training to staff, I shall be taking a basket of nettles, rose elixir, hawthorn vinegar. chickweed pesto and other goodies for people to sample. Should be fun!

1-3 July I'm in Lincoln with the Ageuk Carers Helpline staff training in bereavement and then we go to Winterton where Sky Symphony are performing at the local agricultural show. Let's hope the team are following the antique tractor demonstrations and not the heavy horses!

9 July (Saturday) Springfield Sanctuary Exploring Herbs workshop. July is always a wonderful month to visit, because so many herbs are in bloom along with a wealth of herbs to harvest.

15-17 July Festival at the Edge Possibly one of my favourite festivals - a mixture of fantastic storytelling and folk music. This year will be especially fun as friends are coming with us and Sam Sweeney, Tom Bliss and Nancy Kerr and James Fagin are all performing.

22-24 July. Herbfest 2011. I still can't quite believe I've been asked to speak at this prestigious herb conference at its new venue, Croyden Hall in North Somerset near Dunster where Chris' sister was married last June. Rosemary Gladstar - one of the leading American Herbal Elders - is the keynote speaker and the lovely Glennie Kindred will also be talking about Zen and the Art of drawing. My two talks are both on Saturday afternoon. I'm presenting on "Becoming a Kitchen Herbwife" and "Using vinegars in Herbwifery" which basically means we'll be talking about playing with herbs in your kitchen, wildcrafting, growing and tasting and making things. I'm harvesting and drying a mountain of Swiss mint as we speak to use in some way.

28-31 July Warwick Folk Festival Although this is very close to home, it's held in the grounds of Stephen's old school and we usually take the caravan down and camp. I'm especially looking forward to the Spooky Men's Chorale on the Thursday night and lots of other old favourites. This is the weekend that Richard and Laura's baby is due, so we may be down in Woking instead!

Several people have told me their blog posts for the May blog party will be a little late, so I shall be posting on Monday instead of today.